Five tips for leaving little ones behind
When is the last time you got away with your spouse? Not for a quick dinner but for an actual vacation. Yes, a three-day or even weeklong getaway with only the two of you. Has it been that long?
Many parents with young kids never go away with just their spouse, mainly because they feel guilty leaving the little ones behind. Guess what? Most kids do fine and have lots of fun spending time and strengthening bonds with grandma or auntie or family friends. Here are five tips that will help you and your children feel more comfortable with a short separation.
1) Deal with your guilt.
The most important thing for you to do is come to terms with your guilt so you can walk out the door with a smile on your face. Keep in mind that your children's sense of well-being depends on a strong marital bond. Too many parents neglect their marriage, and later discover that they have drifted too far apart to come back together. If you nurture your relationship and go away for a few days, you will both return with renewed energy for each other as well as for the children.
2) Leave the kids with someone who loves them.
It's best if a family member or a close friend can take care of your kids at your house while you're away. Your children will feel more comfortable and at ease. If you must hire a babysitter, make sure it's someone they know well, and before taking off set up a few trail runs with the sitter. For short weekend getaways, you can suggest a trade with another family: "I'll watch your kid this weekend if you take mine next weekend."
3) Write a letter.
Before you go, write letters to your kids expressing how much you'll miss them and include photographs. The letter will provide your children with comfort when they're feeling sad. Another fun thing to do is hide little notes saying "I love you" in their jacket pockets, book bags or lunch box. You can also leave them a special wrapped present.
4) Plan outings and play dates.
Be sure to let your kids' friends' parents know that you're going out of town and set up play dates ahead of time. Also, plan some fun activities for your kids and their caregiver such as going to the beach or visiting an amusement park, the movies or a swimming pool. Create a special calendar for while you're away, stick it on the refrigerator, and mark all the activities on it. This will give your little ones things to look forward to.
5) Call home.
You should call home at least once to make sure everything is going well, and some parents like to pick up the phone every day. Your approach should depend on your kids. Some children get sad when they talk to mom and dad and sink into a depression. A quick chat gives other kids a boost of confidence and helps carry them through the day. Do whatever is best for your children but be sure to set up a plan before you go and let your kids know when and how often you'll be calling. You can mark "phone call days" on the calendar.
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